More than two-thirds of Orange County teenagers experience some kind of dating abuse. Statistics show that overall, teens are more likely to experience dating violence than any other age group. It’s time to put an end to this trend, and Irvine-based Human Options aims to do just that. 

As a leader in prevention and support for relationship violence, Human Options is empowering teens to take a stand against dating abuse through programs like the “Purple Socks” campaign, conferences, and more. 

“Through this Purple Sock initiative, Human Options aims to teach teens about the red flags of unhealthy relationships and challenge students to be ‘active bystanders’ in prevention efforts around relationship violence and support those who are suffering from abuse,” explains Maricela Rios-Faust, CEO of Human Options. “In order to do so, we’ve partnered with high schools throughout Orange County to create ‘purple outs’ at football games throughout the month of October, Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Football players sport purple socks and students wear purple apparel at selected games to demonstrate that they’re taking a stand against relationship violence in Orange County. We also host informational workshops for students on teen dating violence and educate football players on healthy versus unhealthy behaviors in dating relationships.” 

Santa Ana High School Purple Sock Campaign (Human Options)

According to the CDC, every year, close to 1.5 million high school students nationwide experience physical abuse from a dating partner. Human Options explains that despite the staggering number of teen abuse victims, 81 percent of parents still believe that teen dating violence is not an issue, with more than half of parents not speaking to their children about the topic at all. 

“Teens should know that any type of abusive or controlling behavior is not okay,” says Rios-Faust. 

With the goal of promoting healthy relationships and open communication, Human Options hosted their fifth annual “Love Shouldn’t Hurt” Teen Dating Violence Conference. Free for the community, this conference takes place every February during National Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month. The conference features not only workshops for teens and their parents, but a youth talent show that helps to promote self-expression and confidence. 

“We provide this family conference for middle and high school teens and their parents to help identify behaviors that define dating violence, explore self-expression and ways to engage in healthy relationships while providing resources to individuals in need,” furthers Rios-Faust.

Love Shouldn’t Hurt Teen Dating Violence Conference (Human Options)

For youth looking to help, Human Options offers a Teen Ambassador Program. An integral aspect of their prevention and education programming, this ambassadorship equips teens with the skills needed to serve their communities as peer-to-peer mentors. Participants receive specialized education, leadership development and resource training on how to prevent and respond to dating violence and relationship abuse.

“These student mentors can serve as a resource, a helping hand, a sounding board and a referral service for other teens,” shares Rios-Faust.

So how can teens and their families prevent dating violence? Ongoing dialogue, says Rios-Faust. 

“The conversations should start when your child is young – before high school is the best time for you to address dating safety. Discussions about respecting your partner and consent should take place between parents and teens on a regular basis. Being inquisitive and creating a casual, safe space for your teen to tell you about their relationships opens the door for them to be honest with you. Make sure to talk on their level, answer all questions honestly and always be available. As a parent, it’s important to model healthy communication and relationships.”

Open communication is a tenet of Human Options’ philosophy. While conversations about dating and sex can be uncomfortable with your teens, it’s important to make yourself available if your child needs to talk. 

“Let them know that they can come to you if they ever feel pressured to do something that makes them uncomfortable,” clarifies Rios-Faust. “Remind teens to respect their bodies and set boundaries. Sexual coercion should not be permitted under any circumstance and teens do not have to give in to unwanted advances. It’s okay to say no. Teach them to trust their instincts: if they find themselves alone with someone they do not know or trust, it’s okay to leave.”

For those looking for ways to start this conversation, Human Options recommends their online toolkit, which can be found on their website: humanoptions.org

As awareness of the teen dating violence epidemic grows, positive measures are being taken to reduce statistics. Recently, California Governor Gavin Newsom signed legislation SB 316. The bill requires public schools – including charter or private schools – that serve pupils in any of grades 7 to 12, to print the National Domestic Violence hotline number (1-800-799-7233) on student identification cards. 

Rios-Faust is glad for this bill, stating, “Statistics show that domestic violence in teenage relationships is becoming increasingly common, so having this important resource on student ID cards will help with intervention at a critical age when teens are learning the fundamentals of relationships.”

Human Options began in 1981, when it was founded in Laguna Beach by Vivian Clecak, Carolyn Churm, Margaret Thoreau and Anne Wright as primarily a domestic violence emergency hotline. From there, the organization expanded to include an emergency shelter, transitional housing, various prevention and education programs, as well as community resource centers throughout the county. Thirty-eight years later, the nonprofit has grown to become one of the most respected and impactful organizations in O.C. – a leader in California’s movement to reduce and end domestic violence. 

After years of groundbreaking work to establish Human Options, co-founding CEO Vivian Clecak stepped down and Maricela Rios-Faust stepped into her shoes. In the past four years, Rios-Faust has done tremendous work as CEO, furthering Human Options mission. 

“It’s definitely daunting to succeed someone whose impact was so vast,” shares Rios-Faust. “I’m honored to follow in her footsteps and look forward to continuing to make a difference in the lives of those affected by relationship violence.”

What does the future hold for Human Options? Rios-Faust provides us with some insight: 

“Our goal is very clear: We want to create a future in which every person and family in Orange County experiences safe, healthy relationships and lives free from fear. We will continue to educate Orange County to recognize that relationship violence is an issue that threatens everyone, while also advocating for those affected by abuse, extending a safe place for victims and empowering survivors on their journey of healing.”

Since the COVID-19 pandemic lockdown has taken effect, incidents of relationship violence have surged. Human Options is still fully operating and encourages victims to call their 24-hour hotline at 1-877-854-3594 to access their shelters and other supportive services, including therapists and counselors. 

Those looking to get involved can learn more by visiting humanoptions.org/get-involved. 

To become an ambassador, teens can reach out to our community education department by emailing [email protected] or by visiting humanoptions.org/ambassador. 

Love Shouldn’t Hurt Teen Dating Violence Conference (Human Options)

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